How are you?
Last time we talked about how to shift from feeling lousy to happiness and joy within an instant shift.
What you focus on determines how you feel. How you feel determines how you think, act and the loop continues.
We have said that we can simply change our actions by getting our body active and the moods begin to change.
Another much simpler approach to change your moods is through changing your focus.
How do we change our focus from a negative scenario to one that enlivens and empowers us?
The first is to recognize how we all focus. When people say I am focused, it makes it hard to determine whether it’s a state of mind or an action.
Focus is not something you are; it is something you do.
So, you direct your mind to focus…conscious actions to do so.
How you may ask.
Tony says, and I find it real from practice, that focus comes based on how we evaluate things… We evaluate what to focus on and what not to focus on.
Evaluation is simply asking questions… in this case…to ourselves.
Something happens, the questions we ask ourselves, consciously or unconsciously is:
“What does this mean, how should I react?”
Trigger: KES 300 in my bank account
What does this mean? I am broke! No money again!
How should I react: I told you! Its happening again! Why is this happening? Am I not good enough?
By the time we are in the middle of the questioning and answers we receive, our moods have shifted, we are lost, pensive, lousy and let no one try to ask us for…
With every question we ask, our brains like a super computer will always give us an answer… Just like Google…type in any question and the answers will come up.
Special Tip: To our brain, whatever question we ask, with consistency, and energy, it will get an answer.
For example:
Question: Why do these things happen to me?
Brain: Data of past events (I was laughed at in school etc), past feelings emerges recreating more of that experience.
Habitual focuses are from habitual questions we ask ourselves.
The kind of questions that will get you unhappy thoughts in an instant:
- Why am I so fat? Already presupposes that I am fat.
- Why can’t I ever learn everything. The why here evokes an endless loop of self limiting thoughts… going down the drain of negativity.
- How could he possibly do this? All you can remember will be negative things he/she did.
What if we could ask smarter questions? And what are some of these questions.
What are some examples of such empowering questions?
- What is important to me in life/this situation?
- What can I learn from this?
- Most often, Questions based on:
- What I am about
- What do I value…?
- What I am up to…?
- What is funny about this that I hadn’t noticed…?
Any of these questions when asked with intention, will begin to trigger a new frame of thought and shift our focus.
Ask and be sincere and willing to wait for the answers.
Here is a Special Set of Questions you can ask yourself at any time to change your focus from a negative to a positive pattern:
10 Questions to get you on a Happier, More Confident State Despite any Challenges in your life
- What am I
really most happy about in my life right now?
- If nothing, take another look till you get something.
- What do you
feel really great about if I wanted to?
- What could you feel great about if you wanted to?
- How does that (no 1 & 2) make you feel inside recalling it right now?
- What about that makes you feel great?
- Ask yourself “What else makes me feel great, what about it makes you feel great several times”
- What am I
really grateful for right now?
- How does that make me feel right now?
- What am I
really proud of in my life right now?
- How does that make me feel?
- What else am I really proud of right now?
- Who do I
really love most in my life and loves me right now?
- How does it make me feel to love that person/s
- What can I do about this situation right now?
- What kind of person can I be to make this happen right now?
Over to you. What questions work best for you to shift your focus from a negative thought pattern to happier more confident state?
Can you create your list of questions to use? You can keep it somewhere in your journal where you can always come back to it.
Tip: Ask the question and really spend some time and attention to get the answers. The shift lies in your energy shifting to the answers.
Bonus tip to remember:
Your inner genius awaits you to align with it
You can never bring forth your gift when you are busy entertaining your fears, doubts and misery.
Everything that you give out, you get back magnified. Share this with the people in your life and let’s bring impact, satisfaction and peace of mind back to our generation.
Till next time;
You have never lived this day before, make it a great one!